Friends

I do not take friendships lightly. My friends are my friends. Period. I might or might not be loyal to a fault. When I was growing up, we moved around and, as a result, I don’t have any of those friends that some people have. The ones you have known since kindergarten (or before). The ones that have just always been there. I went to three different elementary schools. Sort of eliminated that kind of friendship for me. So, when I say that I don’t take friendship lightly, I really, really don’t. What I learned from not having any of those friends-from-the-beginning-of-life is to let everyone in and see if a friendship developed – and then hang on to it when it did. I know the value of friendship.

A few years ago, I had the miserable and heartbreaking experience of being betrayed by a trusted friend. It was a take-your-breath-away and I-can’t-believe-it moment for me. How could this happen? I mean, I had been there for this person. I had prayed for this person through a crisis (or a few of them). I was there through major life events and had been supportive. I had upheld my end of the friendship bargain. And now, this?! This was not a small, easily forgotten betrayal. It was massive and it was miserable. It turned my life upside down. It hurt my family – and mamas don’t like it when their families are hurt. It cost me dearly when I had done nothing wrong. It caused my unbelievably forgiving and sweet husband to say unkind things – and that is hard to do. It made me examine other friendships. No way was I going to get blindsided again!

I wallowed around in my misery for a while. I told myself I had earned the right. The emotional pain was very real. It was a how-am-I-going-to-make-it-through kind of pain. And I didn’t really want to share it with anyone. The story was long and complicated. To really understand, you had to understand a couple of decades worth of friendship. And to explain it, I had to reopen that wound and I just didn’t want to do that. Much, much too painful. I shared bits and pieces, but the whole story . . . well, that was almost too hard.  But I did tell Someone. And He listened. He heard my suffering through every word, every tear, every sigh, every gulp, every sob, every breath I tried to take and almost couldn’t, every bit of pain that I couldn’t even put into words. He was my best Friend.

Because . . . we have a covenant. And thanks to the fall Bible study we are doing – Covenant by Kay Arthur – I understand it so much better. He takes care of me when I can’t take care of me. He fights my enemies - when I cannot as well as when I can. That “two become one” thing – that is us. God takes care of me because I am His. He gave me His armor, so I can fight, too. But, most important, He is always there. When I can’t, He does and He will. Always. Forever.

Join us for Bible study. We all watch the same videos and do the same homework, but there is always a message there that is just for me. There’s a message in the study that is just for you, too.

Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command you. No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you. You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, he may give it to you. John 15:13-16